According to a number of international surveys, Denmark is very high on the list of “most desirable countries” of the world to live in. The Danish are supposedly the happiest and most content nationality in Europe.
But “something is rotten in the state of Denmark” It seems that they are restless, they are guilty of a deep and dark secret.
That dark secret is Marmite. It has been banned in Denmark, supposedly because it overdoses the Danes with vitamins. And we all know what happens when Vikings get under nourished and restless.
I foresee a second Danish invasion of the north of England to escape this Dane Law. I see Danes armed with slices of bread and knackebrot landing at Grimsby and storming Sainsbury’s, ambushing Asda and surrounding corner shops, demanding Danegeld. “Your Marmite or your life!”
I predict a British shortage of Marmite as it becomes contraband in Copenhagen, smuggled in iPhones and manbags. Sniffer dogs at airports will be trained to detect brown marks on suitcases or inside the soles of Nike shoes. “Toast soldier” will be the password for smugglers on the run.
These are frightening times we live in.