On being a socialite

If I were famous, like the underfed Paris Hilton, there would be some very boring things read about me in the newspapers.

I love to eat home baked bread, made into toast, with plenty of butter (quelle horreur ). If I could do anything on my day off, I would choose to stay home with overfed cats and “nose buried in book” husband and throw a calorific supper for friends. We would sit around sharing our life experiences, talk about God, the Universe and Everything, drinking endless pots of tea. An exotic holiday of choice would be visiting friends in both hemispheres, hanging out drinking endless pots of tea and cooking up a storm in a variety of kitchens, chatting about God, the Universe and Everything.

Nightmares include shopping for clothes (too much toast and butter), being photographed (too much toast and butter) or being interviewed (especially if I were eating toast with too much butter), driving too fast in a car and getting car sick (too much toast and butter).

I definitely have a much better life than Paris Hilton.